Soon, soon

It dawned on me that I had less than a month before going home...

Trepidation... anticipation... apprehension... excitement...
Rounding up my relationships here... having last dinners with people...
Then it's back to home... with realities and real life... with people there to stay in my life... relationships that last...

I miss my parents very, very much... I used to think that I don't care for my parents enough... but now I realized that I miss them so much more than anybody else... it is crystal clear that they are the only people on this earth whom I can always count on to love me unconditionally... to support me in the things I do...

I gotta go back... to where my responsibilities lie... to the people God sent me to work amidst... to do work that actually counts... to continue the relationships where I left them four months ago... I'm not rejecting the work... in fact I want to be back doing them... time to end my holiday mood...

Although I always felt I missed him, I also feel apprehensive about going back to face him... It conflicts... how does one miss a person and not want to see a person at the same time...?


Nah. just one of ma blue days.